Saturday, February 28, 2009

~~~ W I N G L E S S ~~~

Just leave me your stardust to remember you by...


Who cares what i think,
who cares what i feel
when all they do is treat me with sceptism
I have tried to maintain my sanity
but daily its threatened
I have tried to make them happy
but what do i get?
I do all i have to do,
bend over backwards always
All in a bid to appease
.. and soothe frayed nerves
My pillow soaks daily from my crying out
I'm daily running out of ideas on what to do
How best to placate everyone around me

I'm not a bad person.
Never has been
So pray, where did things go wrong
How am i gonna make them believe in me
when they probably see me as a threat
Its the first time in my life ever
That am faced with this kind of indecision
The pain and tears that wells up in me daily

Cant you see the tears in my eyes
Don't you worry what about what i feel
Don't you feel i must be sad?
You ask why i have been withdrawn
when all i get is disdain and contempt
From the very people who promised love and succor
Am amazed you feel so happy
Thinking in your wildest dreams that i am too

You need have a rethink about life
Think about the time you wouldn't be here
About the things that would be said about you
Yes, you have tried your best is what i hear you say
But have you thought what impact its had on me
Have you thought that food and clothes mean little to me
Love care and affection means the world to me
And thats what i crave from you

I crave love and not hate
I crave affection and support
Do not despise and contempt me
I'm me.I cant change who i am
I've tried to please everyone around me
Make them happy in my own way
Sometimes at my own peril
But its all naughts almost all of the time

Its sad, i know.
Wish i could change this feelings
But every night its there sticking out
One minute, You make me happy and joyous
And the next minute, you make me lose my cool
How come? how have you had so much power over me
Just in one fell swoop, to make me happy
And in another, make me hate the world

How come...
You cant see those lines across my face
You cant see my wry smile
You cant see how much I'm all by myself
Because you chose to ignore
What I'm feeling down within me

Just want you to remember this
Its only one life to live
To create and make a world of difference
If you love me, prove it beyond words
Beyond every other thing you give
Prove it with your love and affection
And all the smiles will come back

For now, I lay my cross on Jesus
He's the only one who cares and sees
The pain and tears in my life
Take me out Oh Lord and let me be
That man you created me to be

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