The fire within

Let your love find me
In this valley that I hide
Lookin out from the window
It’s been so dark in here
With days of solitude
Yet I see the light
Burning like a fire in your hands
Asking you to light this place
The place I call my heart

Misty Eye

Why do you make me cry
Why do you always break my heart
Don’t you see how much I hurt
Each time you step on that line
Don’t you feel my pain
All that I do to make you happy
Still, u watch me bleed each time
Making me slip into abyss
Indifferent about how I feel
How long
How long more..Will it take you
To unbreak my heart…

The winds of Life

The winds of life
Blows from coast to coast
In an unusual trajectory
Sweeping all the stakes
On its path...
However those wind blows
A ship will always berth
And a bird will always fly
As much as my love
Will always stay forever
However the storm of life blows…

hmmm...

Hmmm…the tiny little line is breaking
Piece by piece as I hold tenaciously to it
It promised to be my strength
For me to hang on to, to be safe
Yet it’s falling apart breaking bits by bits
That tiny line served as my succor
Through the rough winds and sunny times
It wouldn’t let go
Until it had had enough
To have nothing to hold me anymore…

Sometimes in November

To nurture and to cherish,
I swore with my breath.
To keep you safe
While you hurt and cry.
In you I found a voice
To share and to lean on
When our hearts were alone
Each time I saw you tear up,
My heart would bleed and bleed
And your worries were my source of kill
Until sometimes in November
When the wings of the eagle was clipped
And the sky ceased to be blue

To the best mom in the world...

Mama…just wanna let you know
How much no one can ever take your place
You have been like a rock behind my back
Calmin my fears and tribulations each time
You have been that one who stood by me
Even when I had no one trustin or believing in me
Through the thick and thin of life
Through the very darkest of time
You would rather have me happy
Than spend a penny on frivolities
You’d give everythin to see me smile
and see to my success in life
How can I ever repay you for your love
So strong, so visible and eternal
Your so far away now but on this day
I just wanna let you know that
You rock mama……..Mama, you truly rock

Twilight................

So indeed this is the end of the road
The beautiful morning rose has lost its fragrance
Lost its color and left to wither
The wailing child will never see her mother
Snatched by the jugulars of death
The sun will no longer spread its shine
Eclipsed and consumed by the dark around it
The curtains fell off
And the stage once dominated by a colossus
Leaves its actor striped and naked
A life treaded on a blossoming path
Is plucked in the nick of time and
Now rots in the embers of six feet below earth…
Adieu….Natasha Richardson.

Eternity...

Love is so beautiful…Enjoy it...
Love is so Precious...hold it in sanctity...
Love is so full of pain…endure it...

Love is all about what you make it…Cherish it

You wont drown

Have you ever been at crossroads and wondered how you were gonna get out? Have you ever wondered why you put in all your best and it just seems your best isn’t good enough. Have you ever wondered why it seems in the world that your just about the only one walkin that straight path, with no help and support from anywhere. Have you ever felt like just givin it all up when you tried all you could and it seem nothing was just working…Lately, everythin just seems to be a drag...no color … no life..it’s like everythin is at that point where you have the stop sign ..when the necessary push isn’t given the desired shove...am at that point where givin up isn’t an option and lettin up isn’t the way to go so am here cryin deep from within my soul for help...Just some color ..Just some bliss...Just a lil happiness…A lil fulfillment to let up this pent up emotions…...Don’t know how I got down this road but aint lettin me drown in this sea.

My Confessions...

Day after day
My heart is still saddened
Dug deep with a gaping hole,
An unfulfilled void

The heart you left is still sore
Aching and gasping for breath
Unable to heal after the ruins
Brought upon it

Still, I wear that uncertain look
Uncertain of what the future holds
Waiting for you even as I bleed
To see if you’ll come take this pain away…

If...

If
The leaves will always be green

If
The birds will continue to sing

If
The sky will always be blue

If
The stars will always shine

If
Your love will ever stay forever

Baby I promise I will always be here

HE ENDURED IT ALL

He endured it all for me
He endured it all that I may live
He endured it all that I may be saved

He was mocked for my sins
They reviled and spat on him
Threw pebbles at him
But still he endured for me

They cast aspersions on him
Calling his God into question
They whipped him until he bled
And as he cried more and more
Under the excruciating pain
He endured it for me

He endured the suffering
The pain and humiliation
Had his garment rented apart
And was nailed to the cross
But he endured it all for me

With hands rammed to the cross
Blood flowing down his arms
And barbed thorns around his head
He still endured it all for me
Supplicating on my behalf before my father
Never giving up on me through the pain
All this he endured for me

He layed down his life
Paying the ultimate price for me
And in my heart,I crucify him
With my words and actions
Still,he never turned his eyes away
Enduring all for me

In my dreams everyday
I see you calling out to me
On the door of my heart,you keep knocking
Waiting patiently for me to open up
Yet have been defiant and stubborn
Still you endured it all

I wake up everyday feeling strong
No lost limbs,no lost arms
Failing to get on my knees
Thanking you for your numerous mercies
Still you endured

Everytime I get into sin
I could imagine the expression on your face
As you bleed within askin me why
I pray and then you forgive me all
Always giving me a second chance
Still im there groping in the dark
Running back to my filth and stench
In it all,you never got tired of me
Stilling enduring it all for me

What manner of man..what manner of love
That wont make you go away from me ,a filthy rag
Your eyes cannot behold unholiness and unrighteousness
Still you wanna wine and dine with me in the thick of my sins
You disapprove of my sinful ways,still you wont go away
Enduring it all for me

My life would have had no meaning
Friends would have walked away
Families would have held their distance
Aquaintances would have scorned me
Had you not been there for me
And been the Lord of my life
Yet,I don’t appreciate you as I should
And still,you endure it all for me

What will I give that will suffice
An unworthy man like me
Where do I start telling of your grace
That’s never unshakeable
For an unworthy man like me
Still in my sins,you see my heart
How much it longs for you
How much it draws from you
How much my spirit desires you
Through my every thought
Even when it seems I despise you

Lord,im ready to give my all
Open my heart.open me up
You created me..you know my being
You redeemed me yet from my mothers womb
Why wont you have your way Lord
Above every other thing in life that holds me down
Why wont you pick me up from the dumps
And shred everythin in my life that wont praise you
Severe anything in my life that wont let me serve you
You’re the Lord of my life
To whom I owe everything
You’re my maker ..you wrote my story from inception
Its time Lord that you take charge
And mold this pot into your like
Frame my heart for you,to serve you
All the days of my life,that the world will see
That you’re the lord of my life
You make me breathe Lord,
I love you soo much,like nothing ever in my life
You’re my everything.

In your eyes...

My gold …My jewel
The beauty of you
And the freshness of your body
Keeps me wanting
The aura of you
Keeps me wondering
Leaving me with shortness
Of breath…
Your smile
Lights up my world
Your soul,
A beauty to reckon with
Swirling my heart
Day by day
Every moon lit night
I’m here wishing…
Leaving me thinking
Of a moment in your arms…

THE SERENITY PRAYER

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

--Reinhold Niebuhr

You dont ever appreciate what you got til its gone.It's a hard lesson of life that we all face at some point hoping that we can all learn from our shortcomings..Enjoy Janet Jackson in one of her all time classics...

DREAMS

Dreams are like candles
Burning out so fast
When left unprotected
The elation, the excitement
All comes to noughts
Like a moment in time
As a fire brimming with flames
All the passion is consumed
Breeding hate and pain
Like gloom on a sullen face
Leaving sorrow in its trail

I love you Mama

There's no word to describe this feeling
There's no match for the thoughts in me
Yet all i can do is wish and imagine
Because your so far away.

I miss you, Mother
No one could ever compare to you
Your love to me is indeed golden
Your affection and care, eternal

I wish i could hold the clock
From ticking away so fast
I wish you were here with me
Right beside me everyday

Everyday i think about you
Your undisputed love and attention
Too many people have tried being you
But they can only try

You will never know how much
How much i long to see you soon
Only time i have to wait upon
Before I'm right by your side soon

I love you Mama

My heart cries out...

I'm so over shadowed with this feeling
This gut feeling of indecision
All road seems wide open and vague
waiting for me to choose which to walk in

People come with their different thoughts
Opinions that don't really count always
They think they know best how to rule you

Saddled with responsibilities everyday
Armed with hope and confronted with fears
Lost in the middle of the road
I'm crying out of my soul for a way out

Where's thy face Oh Lord!
Hide not thy face from your humble servant
My heart groans and mourns for a way out
I have no one but you to bail me out
For my bones are weak and weary.

I need you Lord, i want you more and more
Take me out of this tempest valley
And lead me through the way

I have tried using my wisdom
I have ignored you for too long
and have always had my problems crashing over me

Lord i come to you today
Come fill me with your holiness
Come fill me with your righteousness
And lead me through the long walk

I cant do it no more, I'm crying out
I need you Lord..Help me, help me

This indecision, one too many, cant do it alone
Want you to take my hands in yours and lead me on
I desire you in this wilderness

Show me to whom you've sent to me
Show me the bones which you created out of me
Show me the life you want me to lead and
Crown all with your living spirit within me

Your all i want.Teach me Lord
How not to go astray
Till my eyes catch a glimpse of you
And my heart is filled with your holiness